This Other Eden

one's worth

2006-08-09T08:24:00.000-07:00

by: wildone christian a. ibanez

please clarify and satisfy this curiousity im just asking why your treatment to me is so diffrent i see what am i to you please answer so true i just cant trust my own senses cant seem to find the reason of my essence to you for you i cant seem to comprehend why am i like this for you to you (why....) please answer so true (so true....) this thing that we have is it real or is it nothing will it remain or just be forgotten tell me how am i supposed to react to you what feelings can i send to you

a memory's grave

2006-08-02T07:55:00.000-07:00

by: wildone christian a. ibanez

as i walk over
your memory's grave
i remember your face
with every step i take
the voice that whispers
suddenly becomes clear
its was your voice
that whispers in my ear
as i sit
on this sodden ground
still wet with tears
as i look around
the blue skies
that woke me up
still colored in black
it hasnt comed back
as the rain
suddenly pours
on the memory lane
i was given a tour
moments of you laughing
moments of us talking
your beautiful eyes shinning
i still see them
when im sleeping
so i look down
upon your memory;s grave
remembered all the things
i had and gave
ill light a candle
with flowers along
ill open my eyes
as i say so long

hate beyond comprehension

2006-07-30T07:51:00.000-07:00

its not your fault
i feel this way
this weight
i bear all along
while im
all alone
all alone

i must hate you
if its the only way
to forget you
cause its the only way
to forget
that i love you
i must make
this sacrifice
just to forget
that look in your eyes
that look in your eyes
that made me fall
for you
for you

even if its wrong
even if its againts
what i really feel
i must do this for you
cause youre
with him now
with him now

please do something
to hurt me
please come on
and hurt me
just to make it easy
make it easy for me
to hate you
hate you
my dear love

i was and im still....

2006-07-26T07:13:00.000-07:00

this heart was torn
this heart is till bleeding
yet it still beats on
the sound of your name

im still hurting cause of you
yet im still loving you
have i really fallen (fallen)
that deep into you (you)

he now has and owns you
im left here with nothing else
just pure pain and sadness
eternal tears and loneliness

you didnt mean to hurt me
(didnt mean to)
and i love you just the same
(love you still)

sit here and try to hate you
(but still i look at your picture)
still drowning in your memories
(your name plastered on my heart)
will i ever hear your voice
(or hear you laugh)
will i ever see your eyes
(will they ever look at me)

do i have the right
for this pain
do this tears
have permission
is missing you
ok
is this feeling
allowed

convince yourself

2006-07-10T05:49:00.000-07:00

by: wildone christian a. ibanez

the sun has come down
as i sit here in pain
deep in my thoughts
i still see you
as i force myself
to accept that
there will never be
an us
my heart is in pain
but the feeling of love
still resides
should i cut myself
to better feel the pain
bleed myself
just to numb the feeling
of sadness
bury this love
that i have for you
just to make myself realize
that youre never gonna be mine
never will be mine

happy birthday to me..

2006-07-06T20:23:00.000-07:00

32 minutes
by:wildone christian a. ibanez

its 1:09 am
the 6th day of july
just lying here on my bed
tears silently pouring
out my eyes
cant sleep thinking
bout you and him
and how it came to be
hitted me like
like a runaway bus
without knowing its coming
forcing myself
to believe the reality
that there will never be
a you and me
drowning myself with scenes
of our short lived acquaintance
the dream of being with you
faded with the hope
of a chance on you
a heart is grieving tonight
as a silent orchestra
of sadness
plays a mourning tune
of heartbreak and loneliness
shatters the esence
of happines
with the last note played
later as the sun sets upon me
this heavy feeling for you lingers
knowing it will haunt me
brings shadows
across my path
obscuring the sight of tomorrow
that i am the one
who would be with you
from today everything will be diffrent
with you
knowing he has you
and that youll never be a part of me
has come
its 1:41 am
the 6th day of july
im still awake
writing this piece of grief
seeping out of me
grief that engulfs me in darkness
i know will be with me
for sometime

its entitled 32 minutes, coz basically i wrote it in 32 minutes literallly while i lie on my bed fiddling with my phone where i stored this poem, while silently crying.

wow its my birthday got a year older but still i feel younger that my age says. still on the pace of fixing my life and getting it back on the right track. got a work, well just a stock man for surplus shop at SM cubao. not that flashy also way of my course (information technology) but still im enjoying work. my band's not making progress coz were all busy working and studying, but still i aint quitting. lifes been good since feb. got many good things happening after that. but the most was when i met "lady"

she was a perfect example of one thing that youll really want to have in your life. good natured, shes a bit liberated though but still shes fine in her own way. met her via friendster and her online diary. it was a bliss when i have chances of talking to her. even though i was way out of her league. i fell in love with her, for the second time, i fell because of her eyes, third time i fell for another person who has "anne" in her name. i fell for her, every minute that passed by i fell much deeper into her. i tried to stop myself from falling but you just cant really stop love form eating you. i told her twice, but i didnt expect that much that shes gonna pay attention, i knew i was just a passer by to her. i was just an online friend, nothing more. it was just yesterday that i found out the big news for me. shes has someone already. shes in vacation in town, i was really glad that shes here, but after what i found out, life was drained from me. but i have to move on, for myself. it was a dream knowing her and im thankful for that chance. but its over for me now.

a nice gift for me...... sadness again

lamentation of nonenity

2006-06-30T03:10:00.000-07:00

by:wildone christian a. ibañez

oh catch me as i fall
embrace me
as i break down in tears
oh please take
this pain away
and teach me
how to live again
as your presence
holds my sanity
youre my blissful
sanctuary
single soul
that keeps me from falter
calms the storm
that breaks me apart
inside out
be with me as i walk
through this life
hold my hand
inspire my thoughts
please be by my side
always

*again wrote it while on a lunch break

lady

2006-06-22T06:36:00.000-07:00

by:wildone christian a. ibanez

i was lost when i ment you
wounded deepley by my
tragic past
wasted and broken down
lying on the floor
almost like dead
until you came and risen me
took me in your arms
and cared for me
brought back the life i lost
treated me like im the most
after the last i got afraid
locked myself inside my world
then you came tore down
the walls
i used to isolate my faded soul
grabbed my hand
embraced my weary self
took out the darkness brought me the light
thats why im thankful
for you are here
lady...

*wrote while i was on a lunch break LOL

The Reply

2006-06-19T08:41:00.000-07:00

by:wildone christian a. ibanez

if i asked you on a date
will you go out with me
if i say please lady
will it help you consider
my heart beats like a drum
while i lie and wait for your
reply
imagining scenes of being with you
with eyes open wide
running the memory of asking you
in my head
crossed my fingers while hoping
for the yes in your reply
what if you turned me down
and said no
turned your back and walk away
will i still have the chance
of asking you again

*its been long since i last wrote a poem so hope its ok ^_^

again by lenny kravitz

2006-06-16T09:18:00.000-07:00

I've been searching for you
I heard a cry within my sou
lI've never had a yearning quite like this before
Now that you are walking right through my door

All of my lifeWhere have you been?
I wonder if I'll ever see you again
And if that day comes
I know we could win
I wonder if I'll ever see you again

A sacred gift of heaven
For better, worse, wherever
And I would never let somebody break you down
Nor take your crown, never
All of my lifeWhere have you been?
I wonder if I'll ever see you again
And if that day comes
I know we could win
I wonder if I'll ever see you again

And everytime I've always known
That you were there, upon your throne
A lonely queen without her king
I longed for you, my love forever

to whom it may concern

2006-06-14T08:09:00.000-07:00

YOU made me really happy I know you dont know Anytime that you are ready Let us start our talk show WE talk about anything Anything under the sun Even sometimes I say nothing Its because Im having fun I wish that I can see The smile thats in your face So that I can also be Happy till the next days I know this is nonsense These things that I say now My heart is getting tense Because I still dont know how If you can read this letter Please ask me if we talk Dont ask me later Or Ill turn around and walk Ask me if I LOVE YOU And if I really mean it too Coz Im too shy to tell you Coz Im in-love with you

from a fellow rakista:alagadnibatya

makeshift bed for two alone

2006-06-13T07:53:00.000-07:00

accompanied by the sweet glow of the satellite
i watched you fall into oblivion
you looked tired..restless even
but your skin glows brighter than the moonlight
i touched you..you are warm..a feeling you thought
youve already forgotten..
lying here in our makeshift bed for two
we were one..

The Fast and The Furious: Tokyo Drift

2006-06-11T03:52:00.000-07:00

been waiting all summer for this movie!!!

every little thing

2006-06-10T05:40:00.000-07:00

Let me in
to see you in the morning light
to get me on and all along the tears they come
see all come
I want you to believe in life
but I get the strangest feeling that you've gone away
will you find out who you are too late to change?
I wish I could be every little thing you wanted
all the time
I wish I could be every little thing you wanted
all the time some times
lift me up just lift me up don't make a sound
and let me hold you up before you hit the Ground
see all come
you say you're all right
but I get the strangest feeling
that you've gone away- you've gone away
and will you find out who you are too late to change?
I wish I could be every little thing you wanted
all the time
I wish I could be every little thing you wanted
all the time some times
Don't give me updon't give me up tonight
or soon nothing will be right at all
salvation will you find out who you are too late to change?
I wish I could be every little thing you wanted

*i just wish i could lady........

summer is over, am i still welcome

2006-06-04T08:43:00.000-07:00

it's only a week left till summer dies
and my heart is left watching in the corner of the room...
breathless, still and nervous...

"when summer ends, would you leave me?"
"when summer dies, would you die with me?"

my eyes started to feel as cold my hands,
left to the tidings of fate and the engines of hope...

night after night, i pray that this never ends...
that summer never dies...
that love never fades...

the summer is over, am i still welcome?

from rakista.com

you Are my Beautiful Ghost

2006-06-01T23:16:00.000-07:00

it haunts my heart with painful sweetness
gives me sanity all over may body
the beauty of the curves of yours,
reminds how warm your kiss is
your eyes is my refuge
it eases every pain...

the distance seperates us
but never my love
all i have is your memoirs
of photographs and reminiscence

like a ghost in my midst
i emraced you in the air
pretending that you are here
lying on my very chest....

by:atlanfer of rakista.com

Crumbling walls of Romance....

2006-06-01T08:44:00.000-07:00

can i try my luck on you

i've waited long enough for you no more wasted time alone, saving the message you sent to me, is it okay? i'll be waiting, did it ever crossed your mind, that i'm falling for you, and i never had the time and i don't have the words to say i'm falling out of place to another lonely road, the words i want to say seems to hide behind my head, the message that you sent, i kept it in my heart, i'm falling out of place to another lonely you. the night is young and no stars, but your voice soothes my ears, you broke up with your boyfriend, is it okay? if I'll be waiting.

ice

when can I see you again? cause you're always in my mind when can i meet you again? cause i'm waiting all the time is it wrong if i tell you what i feel? why are you doing this to me ? i guess it's wrong for me to say those things cause I'm not cool enough for you i know that it is true that i'm not cool but i can give you all of me when can i see you again? cause i wanna tell you i'm sorry why didn't you answered my calls i'm begging you please call me do i need attention from you? but the snubbing that i got and if you ask me if i'm okay well i'll tell you i'm not.

deeper i fall

tomorrow i'll wait for the setting sun like the day i waited for you to come i even think ill be gone tomorrow i'll wait for the setting sun what i want you to have are my memories of you we both know we can't be in the same place in the same room all i do is wait for you and wait once more than more you ignore me the deeper i fall.

*today's the darkest day......

Memories ^_^

2006-05-22T00:44:00.000-07:00

Taken way back when i was in 1st year college, back when our band was just meant for school affairs :D Payat ko pa hahahah! and in uniform, 1st solo pic ko in a studio while in practice for a performance on our foundation day hehehehe! nung nabubuo pa lang ang core group ng band namin called "360 madness" back then. Then after some of the original members left, new friends became part of the new band, named "Pinstripe" (above pic), in our very 1st official Gig //-_=]3\m/.

State of Relief

2006-05-19T08:05:00.000-07:00

weeeee!

im in relief today!
weeeeeee! kala ko she thinks im a kind of a stalker or something, turning out she was quite busy lng pala wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeew! hay salamat!

Hahahahaha! im elated, im happy, im glaaaaaaad!

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

now this is what i call a day.......

Two One Four

2006-05-18T23:10:00.000-07:00

Am I real?
Do the words I speak before you
Make you feel
That the love I have for you
Will see no ending?
Well, if you look into my eyes
Then you should know
That you have nothing here to doubt
Nothing to fear
And you can lay your questions down
'Cause if you'll hold me
We can fade into the night
And you'll know
The world could die
And everything may lie
Still you shouldn't cry
'Cause time may pass
But longer than it'll last
I'll be by your side
Take my hand
And gently close your eyes
So you could understand
That there's no greater love tonight
Than what I've for you
Well, if you feel the same way for me
Then let go
We can journey to a garden no one knows
Life is short, my darling
Tell me that you love me
So we can fade into the night
And you'll know
The world could die
And everything may lie
But you won't cry
'Cause time may pass
And everything won't last
But I'll be by your side
Forever by your side
So you won't cry

Top 10 Wishes....

2006-05-16T07:32:00.000-07:00

1. See and Meet her personally
2. Peaceful Life
3. A new Personal Computer
4. Finish my Course
5. Reunion with my old friends
6. New Hair Do
7. Mp3/Pendrive Player
8. Brand new Drum Sticks
9. Compose a Song for my band
10. Attend an Official Rock Concert

Malungkot kong Mundo

2006-05-15T21:57:00.000-07:00

kung tulog ka pa

wag ka munang gumising

kung ikaw ay mahimbing

sayong pansamantalang mundo

at ikay malayo sa gulo

baka di mo makayanan

ang iyong mga pagmamasdan

o dito sa aking mundo

ay puno ng galit at sakit

o di mo maitatago

ang mga luha mo

sa malungkot kong mundo

kung gising ka na

wag ka munang bumangon

dyan ka lang dahil sa labas

umuulan ng dugo at luha

dyan ka lang

ipikit mo ang mga matang

di makakayanan

ang kanilang pagmamasdan

o dito sa aking mundo

ay puno ng galit at sakit

o di mo maitatago

ang mga luha mo

sa malungkot kong mundo

Infatuations always there

2006-05-15T07:30:00.000-07:00

*currently whats happening to my so called love life......

i understand
what you're trying to say
no need to say it i am leaving
but don't walk away
just stay right there i'll fall
and i'll just look at you
i'll just look at you
i'll just look at you
i'll just look at you
i don't know why
i always feel like this
it's hard to breathe when you're around
your big blue eyes
are drowning me to sleep
the space is tearing me
i'll stay, please stay
i'll stay, please stay
i'll stay, please stay
i'll stay, please stay
words are not important
smiles are all i need from you
the yearningit's getting stronger im dumb
i hope you like me too
you're two tables away
you could see me mezmerised
i want to talk to you but im so scared
before i never cared
infatuation's never therebut now it's killing me
i really hate myself
i really hate myself
i really hate myself
i really hate myself
words are not important
smiles are all i need from you
the yearningit's getting stronger im dumb
i hope you like me too
words are not important
smiles are all i need from you
the yearningit's getting stronger im dumb
i hope you like me too

One Jaw Breaking Experience

2006-05-15T07:15:00.000-07:00

weeeeeeeeeee!

glad im able to get OL for a while, just went to a dentist to get my mouth one hell of an overhaul :D goodthing my pearly whites are fixed (well some of it are still white XD) got another appointment on thursday, i ask myself, am i still up to more this and that, weel if it wasnt for my work......anyways glad my smile's back to the way it used to be, not fully but good. anaesthesia's really still hanging around my mouth so i cant really talk that much (droools dripping haha) well half of my jaw is numb, i clip something on it and i left it for a long time... too bad i dont have a digi cam to document it haha!

next time ill spend more time on my maintenance rather than using it that much, it was a painfull experience,but that what i had to pay.....

cheers!

wala lang files

2006-05-13T06:44:00.000-07:00

its a saturday, starting with a tropical storm haha, kakatamad bumangon amf XD. anyways, just spendingmy free time, ill get busy na sa monday, gearing up for my new work, got an appoinment with my dentist tomorow (scared of dentists ^^). hahah! church bukas, and its mother's day, got a special # with a few youths in church pra sa mother's day, thank god im not singing haha! sad to say, i wont be online that much. nakakapanibago, computing (computers) are my life na, hinde ako sanay na nde mka OL, haha ill miss my friends online, bihira na kc magkitakita kya on line n lng ang pagasa haha. ill miss my blogsite, kakastart ko lng tpos nde ko n masyado magagalaw (huhuuhuh...), ill miss visiting senyoritas blog, messaging her, waaaaaaaaaaaaah! chatting with my friends, playing online games (RF,RayCrash etc.) di bale kikita nmn ako ng pera hahaha! XD, i wont say goodbye, just moving to a new phase of my life...

I'll miss you guys !!!

Jeepney by: Kala

2006-05-12T06:58:00.000-07:00

Excuse me Miss.. mawalang galang nga
Kanina pa kita kasi napapansin
Magkakilala ba tayo,
Ay hindi pasensiya na

Excuse me Miss, nangungulit lang po
Ang ganda mo palang tumawa
Pwede bang magpakilala
Magpakilala sayo

Huwag kang matakot sa kin
Hindi ako multo
Kung ayaw mo, ok lang
Pasuyo na lang ng bayad ko, bayad ko..

Sukob na, konti na lang
At aandar na ang ating jeepney
Sandaang tao ang nakasakay
tila galit at naniniksik pa

tara na, konti na lang
at aandar na ang ating jeepney
hindi na makapag hintay umuwi
basta’t kasama ka

Excuse me Miss.. mawalang galang nga
Kanina pa kita kasi napapansin
Magkakilala ba tayo,
Ay, hindi pasensiya na

Huwag kang matakot sa kin
Hindi ako multo
Kung ayaw mo, ok lang
Pasuyo na lang ng bayad ko,

Sukob na, konti na lang
At aandar na ang ating jeepney
Sandaang tao ang nakasakay
tila galit at naniniksik pa

tara na, konti na lang
at aandar na ang ating jeepney
hindi na makapag hintay umuwi
bastat kasama ka

hello Miss, nakatingin ka na naman
Meron ka bang nais malaman
Aba, oo malapit ako doon
Gusto mo teka lang, saan sa may Bicutan

Salamat ng marami
Dito na ako bababa
Tatawagan na lang kita
Tatawagan na lang kita
Tatawagan na lang kita

konti na lang
At aandar na ang ating jeepney
Sandaang tao ang nakasakay
tila galit at naniniksik pa

tara na, konti na lang, konti na lang, konti na lang
at aandar na ang ating jeepney
hindi na makapag hintay umuwi
bastat kasama ka

*sweet song liked it, cheesy lines but still it sounds good when youre sound tipping, bout to upload it to my player...enjoy na lang pag uploaded na. cheers!

2006-05-10T08:35:00.000-07:00

meet uchiha obito, the "naruto" character where i got my new nick from, i kinda liked his character in the manga series, it wasnt adapted into anime but if you read that chapter of the manga, youll like it guys, hes as same as me, i mean his character. this should answer the question of some of my friends about my nick "uchihaobito" haha!

Wala Lang Files..

2006-05-08T07:30:00.000-07:00

ahhh! another day has passed, when i woke up i thought im gonna have a good day, things i normally do, was done good, no hassles, mistakes. then it got better, a friend of mine has returned from vacation (weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!), i was so glad that i could mssge her again ^^, we chatted, talked about things, this and that, i was chatting with my smile as wide as it can be. the truth was i like that person, in a short time, i liked her for what she was. and so, it came out fine, it turned out not what i expecpted, but still it was good, im still hoping it would be more.....but now im contented with what we are ^^, im very very glad this day. this was a fine day for me ^^ i just hope it will go on from now on ^^.........

3 Libras...a sad song T~T

2006-05-03T02:19:00.000-07:00

threw you the obvious and you flew
with it on your back, a name in your recollection
thrown down among a million same.
difficult not to feel a little bit disappointed
and passed over
when i've looked right through
to see you naked and oblivious
and
you don't see me.but i threw you the obvious
just to see if there's more behind the eyes
of a fallen angel
the eyes of a tragedy
here i am expecting just a little bit
too much from the wounded
but i see through it all
and see you
so i threw you the obvious
to see what occurs behind the eyes of a fallen angel
eyes of a tragedy
oh well. apparently nothing
you don't see me
you don't see me at all.

Late Night....errr...Morning

2006-04-30T10:28:00.000-07:00

its already 01:27 in the morning and im still awake XD, and my starting time tomorow is 7am, OH MY GOD! i only have 5 hrs of sleep!?!.... oh my maaaaaaaaaaaaan! any ways, i love my work, prang call-center lang ahaha! libre laro pa /gg... post again asap, nothing's been happening much lately, juts things this and that XD

Binibini

2006-04-24T21:01:00.000-07:00

Binibini

Binibini sa aking pagtulog
Ika'y panaginip ko
Panaganip ng kathang dakila
Nitong pag-iisip ko
Ang katulad mo raw ay birhen
Sa abang altar ng punong pag-ibig
O kay ganda
O kay gandang mag-alay sa 'yo

Alaala, at isip at pagod
Sa yo'y binigay ko raw
Binibini, ang aking dalangi't dasal
Dininig mo raw
Wika mo raw ay iingatan ka
Magpakailanman ang purong pag-ibig
O kay ganda
O kay ganda mag-alay sa 'yo Hooh...

Sa 'king tanong magkatutoo
Kaya Sagot mo para nang sinadya Hooh...
Pagsapit ng magandang umaga
Ako'y bumalikwas din
Panaginip naglaho't natunaw
Nguni't nar'yan ka pa rin
Paraluman, ikaw ay akin
Sa bisang lakas ng purong pag-ibig
O kay ganda
O kay gandang mag-alay sa 'yo
O kay ganda
O kay gandang mag-aly sa 'yo

Confessions of a Grade Schooler...

2006-04-23T19:01:00.000-07:00

Have you ever have the eperience of confessing your feeelings to your teacher?
Thats what a felt last night, when i confessed to a very beautiful lady....
Being shy isnt bad, but it has its ups and downs, i felt so shy confessing to her, but im glad it was ok, she didnt react badly, in fact she laughed, but still i feel ok....

Cuida...

2006-04-21T07:23:00.000-07:00

Cuida
by:Sugarfree

kung ako lang ang masusunod
aakuin ko ang yong pagod
di ka na muling luluha
lahat ng yong dinadala akin na

kung akin lang ang mundo
ibibigay ko siya sa iyo

kung pag aari ko lng ang lumbay
itatago ko siya habang buhay
wala nang inggit wala nang galit
paliligayahin kita bawat saglit

kung aking lang ang mundo
ibibigay ko siya sa iyo

kung hawak ko lang ang panahon
wala nang kahapon at bukas
meron lang ang ngayon
nais koy maging saysay ng aking buhay
ay bigyan iyon ng kulay

kung akin lang ang mundo
ibibigay ko siya sa iyo...

tanging sa iyo....
ang mundo....

-means take care in "chabaccano" a native cebu language (if im correct XD)

Accidental Blogsite...

2006-04-19T03:43:00.000-07:00

i didnt plan on creating my blogsite, i just experimented on how a blog works. actually i was trying how to create a blog skin for a friend ( XD), i got hooked on developing the blog, so i decided on continuing the site... wala lang hahahaha!

Errrr......Testing......

2006-04-18T07:10:00.000-07:00

just testing the blog haha XD